I am Leah

Genesis 29:31-35

31 When the LORD saw that Leah was hated, he opened her womb, but Rachel was barren. 32 And Leah conceived and bore a son, and she called his name Reuben, for she said, "Because the LORD has looked upon my affliction; for now my husband will love me." 33 She conceived again and bore a son, and said, "Because the LORD has heard that I am hated, he has given me this son also." And she called his name Simeon. 34 Again she conceived and bore a son, and said, "Now this time my husband will be attached to me, because I have borne him three sons." Therefore his name was called Levi. 35 And she conceived again and bore a son, and said, "This time I will praise the LORD." Therefore she called his name Judah. Then she ceased bearing.

My middle name is Rachel, but in the past 24 hours, I have felt more like her older sister. She was in a terrible situation; married to a man who was so much more in love her sister, that, in comparison, his feelings toward her are deemed hatred.

What is her response? I think she has the mentality of Sarah, of Rebekah, of me and probably of you - to fix the situation herself. She takes advantage of a blessing that the Lord gives her, an open womb. The Bible here specifically shows that it is God who chooses who will birth and who will not, which is logical since it is God who prepares a destiny for each life. Leah, instead of being grateful, instead of pouring into these new lives of children who love her more than their father ever will, exploits them for one purpose: maybe now Jacob will love her.

Isn't that what we do? I am guilty of being so wrapped up in ascribing my worth from man's esteem for me. The ironic thing is that she knows Who the source of her blessing is. She gets progressively worse, though with the first three sons. With Reuben, she realized that God is seeing her affliction. Yet her perspective is limited: He is only the conduit of the solution to her problem with her husband. The problem, however, remains. With Simeon, God is no longer looking out for her, but just hearing of her complaints. Jacob still loves Rachel more, though. With Levi, God is hardly in the picture. She is still clinging to the notion that now, surely now, her husband will attach to her. Does he change? No, no he does not.

Finally, with the fourth son, her mindset shifts: "Now I will praise the Lord." After exhausting herself pursuing a love that would not be reciprocated, she turns to the One who loved her from the onset. His is the love that was, is, and will always be, and in its perfection, it always satisfies. In fact, it alone can satisfy. Why does Leah stop bearing children at this point? She has learned to be content in all circumstances, because her worth is found in the perfect Lover.

I have acted like Leah. We all have on occasion. But now, let us follow her example of repentance. Let us come before God, asking Him again to forgive our idolatry, our selfishness, and thank Him for loving us in spite of it. Let us be content with His love, letting it bring us peace.

God bless,

Alisha

Repentance = you-turn?

I was laying in bed, mulling over the slop of my life and trying to find a gospel solution to dissolve this mess (pun totally intended) so I can lift up my atrophied legs and begin to walk again. Discipline ... discipline I have always lacked. My mind conceives of a runner, prepping for the race of life, guzzling down bowls of spaghetti and rising before the sun does to climb the steps of the Art Museum, and unlike Rocky who dances at the top for a while, she runs back down and up again, over and over. That, to me, sounds boring. And I feel guilty that it does. I have no desire to do what I know is right, even though I know that, not only is it righteous, but it behooves me to do it. I want to glutton my desires.

Then somehow I think of a phrase that would make a great T-shirt: Repentance = you-turn. I immediately reject the idea, because I fall into the category of girls who are against fads because it's fashionable to do so. I admit it. But then I realize the real reason to reject the idea - it's wrong. Yes, repentance is about the 180, but I'm so stuck in muck that I can barely turn my head, much less my whole body. Repentance is about my turn-around, but I lack the power to do so. I need an outside Source.

And here is where my philosophies become praise: if somehow I could muster the mental strength to turn around, I would get the glory and honor. But if the Power is external, it becomes the wow-factor. It receives the awe. He demonstrates His brilliance in a God-designed adoration system. Now, repentance isn't a drag (again, pun), but excites my spirit because it lets me do what my being craves - to worship Him perfectly. And I don't have to wait 'til heaven to do so.

What's the plan, Phil(ip)?

I hold myself as a woman of faith. As of late, I must confess to be governed more by fear than faith, and for this reason, I have left you all for quite some time. Fear and faith cannot coincide, just as darkness with light. But God has been slowly challenging me on my level of faith, and I have discovered that I am severely lacking.

One thing I notice is that I'm becoming more like a woman everyday. I'm developing that intuition, which is helpful, but I'm also exhibiting flaws that seem to be in my very nature. Over this summer, I go to hear a series of teachings by Ms. Stacie Hooke. Truly life-changing teachings. She brought up a valid point - that she can identify with Eve's "issue" at the Garden of Eden. She knew the command to abstain from the fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil given to her husband, Adam [Genesis 3:1-3]. I don't think she'd have had a problem obeying it either, save for one crucial missing item. Why? Just tell me why and I'll obey.

Oh, how I empathize with my ancestral mother! This, I wisely foresee, will be a problem in my future marriage, but more importantly (infinitely so), is a problem NOW in my relationship with Christ. Tell me why, Lord! Tell me why I must suffer, and I'll go through it willingly.

As a side note, it's interesting that this seems to play a role in abusive relationships, too. As part of the curse (which, I here emphasize, is no longer binding to those who are in Christ), the woman would long for her husband, and he would be head over her [Genesis 3:16]. I personally interpret this to mean that she will endure the hard burden of a man lording over her, even harshly, because her desire for him will be so strong. So long as the men give a reason, no matter how illogical it may be, many women stay in those relationships. In school, while practicing talking to battered and abused women, a common excuse was, "He only acts this way when I mess up." Of course, this does not warrant his behavior, but so long as an explanation is given, some women will persist in that harmful environment. God does not abuse those He loves. And we all deserve to be in a relationship with someone who loves us as Christ Himself loves His bride, the Church [Ephesians 5:25-31]. This is the truth. Any interpretation otherwise is dangerously false.

God does, however, keep us in the dark. It makes it (Father, forgive me) so annoying to follow Him. I want to know the plan. Women want to know the plan. The title of this devotional is taken from the popular sitcom, Modern Family, but it's a question I demand of myself every morning. What's the plan, Philip? Let me evaluate where God is taking me and extrapolate where He'd want me to go next. Much more rarely, I actually sit down and pray and ask Him where He wants me to go next.

Lately, He has not been answering. It's so frustrating that I am tempted with thoughts of divorce.

For those struggling as I have, and am, here is some advice I have picked up these several months.

1. Be assured, God loves you. If you really get this, then you probably won't need the other steps, for they will come naturally. Evidence: every gospel account of the Crucifixion, every book written by Apostle John, and more specifically Jeremiah 31:3.
2. Combat those thoughts with the Word of God. This was Jesus' own tactic during temptation, so I doubt you discover one better [Luke 4:1-13].
3. Remember His faithfulness. Be painstakingly specific. I'll share a personal example. On the night of October 30, 2005, I was in a horrendous car accident. Looking at the horseshoe-shaped vehicle afterward, and how remarkably unscathed I was despite my lack of an airbag, I was immediately assured that God was concerned with my safety and well-being, and that He must indeed have a purpose for the rest of my life here on this earth. I was overwhelmed; automatically from my eyes sprung tears of joy and from my mouth sprung worship and praise to my great Creator God. My spirit was connected to His Holy Spirit alive inside of me, together worshiping the Holy King, Magnificent Lord, my El Shaddai, my Jehovah Jireh. Thinking of that moment brings my pipsqueak trials to scale.
   

God is so good, even when I don't know the next step. As the Christian adage goes, I don't know what tomorrow holds, but I know Who holds tomorrow.

God bless,
Alisha

A Call to Action

*Scriptures taken from Biblegateway.com

Galatians 5:13, 14 says, "... But through love serve one another. For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this: 'You shall love your neighbor as yourself.'" There are so many Biblical references to our last Back to Basics lesson on service, but this is the one I find to be all-encompassing and thus easier to remember. Through love, we must serve one another. Our first Back to Basics lesson spoke of how much God loves us. I think it is fitting to end emphasizing how we ought to love others in turn.

Jesus said that there were two great commandments, both equally important and inseparable. They are to love the Lord, and to love others. [Mark 12:29-31]. Loving others is often the harder of the two, because a perfect God does not require our forgiveness. But we are required to forgive even when we do not wish to do so, as we learned in lessons 5 and 6. Forgiveness alone, however, is not enough. I believe, stronger than ever before, that love requires action.

Christ Himself set the example for us to follow in John 13:1-17. The Last Supper was His last time with all of His disciples before His death. In those final moments, Jesus did the unthinkable, washing the feet of His followers, a job that was assigned to lowly servants. When Peter refused, Jesus said something critical, "If I do not wash you, you have no part in Me." Flip-flopping Peter took it to mean a ceremonial cleansing, and immediately changed his tune, asking to have his hands and head cleaned as well. But that was not Jesus's purpose. He explained that He was setting a standard as their Master. As He humbled Himself in servitude, so we ought to do one another.

Following the Lord's example sows a seed in heaven, for once taking our eyes off ourselves and placing them on others. Jesus tells the parable of the rich fool, who thought he would store up his bountiful harvest into barns and live off it his whole life, not knowing that night his soul would be required of him. [Luke 12:13-21] During this Christmas season, it reminds me of Mr. Scrooge, working so diligently to save every penny without investing in the eternal bank. Christ warns us to spend our efforts storing up treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy and thieves cannot break in and steal [Matthew 6:19-21] (see Absolutes). The more I think about that verse, the more practical it becomes. Focusing on myself is costly:
- I spend money on expensive toys and quick pleasures.
- I spend time working for the money for those toys and pleasures.
- I spend effort trying to secure those toys and pleasures, worrying constantly.
Why not invest in something that cannot be stolen or destroyed? That saves me effort and money, and saves me from worrying. I used to argue that I hadn't the time to spend helping in soup kitchens or counseling an acquaintance, but I have found that time multiplies when you're doing God's will by establishing His kingdom on earth.

Tony Campolo argues convincingly that when we do God's will, we should see a reflection of God's kingdom here on earth as it is in heaven. His kingdom is vividly described in Isaiah 65:17-25. If we're not seeing the kingdom of God, and we're not doing something about it, then can we say we are doing God's will? I'll give an example. Verse 22 of that chapter says that the people of that kingdom will not build and another inhabit. That verse convicts me when I think of migrant workers who make a living (if you can even call it that) off of infrequent construction jobs, building up homes worth hundreds of thousands, while they live as nomads.

This is not a social commentary, because I am tired of commenting. This is a call to action. The people of God spend a lot of time talking about problems and not enough time doing something. You may think the problems of this world are so large that one person, one day cannot make a difference. I'm reminded of the story of a boy who saw thousands of starfish washed ashore, and futilely threw them back one by one. Some passerby told him he'll never be able to make a difference; there were just too many fish. But the boy picked up one starfish, and after tossing it into the ocean he said, "Made a difference to that one."

You can make a difference; you just have to start. Stop sitting down at your computer and do something. Even extending a cup of cold water to the glory of God has its reward [Matthew 10:42]. It's never too late and no action is too small. But action is necessary.

I have spent over two years now writing devotionals for Strong Christian Women, encouraging them to a deeper relationship with their Creator. I still feel that is important. But now I feel God is calling me to be more than a woman of the Word. I need to be a woman of my word. I cannot expect those of you who have faithfully followed these devotional series to do something I have not done myself. God is calling me to take a leave of absence for some time, to resign as a commentator and start a life of action. I know not for how long, but when God calls me back to this group, He will have laid a foundation of experiences from which I can instruct. Until then, be the women who God has called you to be. Be courageous and do not back down. Be strong Christian women.

God bless,
Alisha

Gaining perspective

*Scriptures taken from Biblegateway.com

In her song "Where You Go I Go," Kim Walker emphasizes through repetition the importance of following Jesus's example. A phrase she chooses to repeat in her chorus is, "What You pray, I pray." It's funny because she is singing this chorus to God, saying, "What You pray, I pray." I think that there is a problem with Christian society today in that we do not pray as God prays.

That sounds so weird. Can we believe that God prays? Can we understand that He prays to Himself? We know that Jesus prayed when He was here on earth, but I always assumed that He prayed because He was human, and He prayed in order to resist His humanity and embrace His divinity. I guess that's true to some extent, however (or maybe in conjunction with it), I now think He prayed because He wanted to say the words that God wanted Him to say. He would only pray as God prayed.

Let's consider this word "prayer." I remember in a movie, The Preacher's Wife, the preacher tells this ruffian kid that prayer is just hope. So, using his definition, when we tell God, "What You pray, I pray," we are actually telling Him is, "What You hope is what I hope for." In other words, we say, "I am going to work toward Your will. I know what Your general will is, and I am going to submit to it."

We know God's will by reading His word. Recall in an earlier devotional that I wrote of the sovereignty of God and living under His sovereign Word, knowing that if He says it, then that is how it is going to be. I compared it to the Constitution as the supreme law of the land, being able to supersede and at times negate other laws. It simply is what's going to happen. If we know God's will, we should be working towards it because that is what is going to ultimately occur. And if we have that faith, then our hope is assured. It's the certainty of our hope.

Isn't it crazy? That is the most effective type of prayer. It's a prayer that says what God intends for it to say. It speaks using our mouths but His words. How frustrating! It is particularly convicting, especially when I consider my prayers, which tend to be about what I want for myself and what I want for others, qualified with the phrase, "But only if it's Your will." And then I sit and say that I have given into God's hands, but I am still worrying because I do not know if it is God's will. That cannot be the way God wanted us to pray. I can't believe that.

I think God wants us to leave our prayer with an assurance of that we know God's plan. I think of Daniel's fast [see Daniel 10:10-14]. Daniel would not relent in his fast, refusing to get up until God's answer came. This was one man who really knew God and His plans. God revealed incredible things to Daniel. And even he fasted for 21 days! The amazing thing is that an angel tells Daniel that he was sent to him the very day that Daniel "humbled himself." The answer surely comes, but it may take a while before it reaches our ears.

Can I sit there and wait until I know God's answer to a situation? How many of us can honestly pray like that? I should tell you ladies that this is not originally my idea. It is something Philip Yancey writes of in his book on prayer. One of his key points is that we gain perspective when we pray. I want to gain perspective. I don't know about all of you, but I really do not know how this world works. I am very childish - I'm young in my heart, young in my mind, young in my spirit. There is many things left for me to learn. If I can barely figure out how the world works, how much less do I understand the ways of God! Granted, God's ways are always going to be mysterious to us, but I want to know what He is doing.

I am going to tie this to an unexpected Biblical character - Zaccheus. Luke 19:1-10 tells us that Zaccheus was a very evil man. He was a tax collector notorious for taking more money from the already oppressed than the government required, pocketing the difference. He was truly a vile extortionist. And this man dared to approach Jesus because he was driven by his desire to see Him. He had a problem though; he was a very short man, and there was a large crowd surrounding Jesus. He could have chosen to push through the crowd. As a little man, I am sure it would not have been too difficult to maneuver. But that was not what he wanted to do. He was not concerned with the people but Jesus Christ. He decided the best thing to do was to get away from the crowd and go up a tree to see what Jesus was doing. After this, Jesus sees him, calls him down, and Zaccheus's life is forever changed. He even restores fourfold what he illegally took from his fellow citizens.

What was the pivotal turning point? I think it was his choice to go up that tree. If he did not go up to the tree, he would have ever saw what Jesus was doing. If he did not see what Jesus was doing, he never would have changed his ways. Notice Jesus called him after he went up the tree, not beforehand. Maybe Jesus was unaware of Zaccheus being behind the crowd. But the important point is that when Zaccheus took that step, when Zaccheus was determined to see who Jesus was and what He was doing, that is when his life was changed and he started doing what Jesus always wanted him to do. Most of us get it twisted. We think that if we do the things Zaccheus did after his heart changed, then we can come before God and pray and see what He is doing, as we have a right to come before God. But Zaccheus did it the right way. He went away from the crowd and gained a higher view.

I am going to admit something. I am short of stature when it comes to my Christ. I am incredibly short. If I am short, then what right have I to come before Him? I cannot push through the crowds; I have no reason to interrupt what Jesus is doing. But I want so desperately to see Him. I know that I have a purpose in His grand will, and I am going to learn what it is by gaining a new perspective through prayer. I know you can do what I am going to try to do, which is to not leave and get up off my knees until I have the assurance of the answer, until I gained the perspective, until I have learned what it is that Jesus is doing. Then we will pray what God prays.

God bless,
Alisha

Faith after defeat

*Scriptures taken from Biblegateway.com

When I started writing this devotional, I wanted to write about the amazing feats of Joshua's generation. I thought about how Joshua commanded that the sun stand still over the battlefield, and how the Lord listened and made the sun be still for a whole day. [Joshua 10] The Bible says that the Lord did something that day that He never did before nor did He ever do again - He heeded the voice of a man [Joshua 10:14]. What an amazing testimony! There are rare occasions when we see people so in tune with God that He actually does as they ask. All I could think about was, if there was never a precedent for it, what faith did it take for Joshua to ask for the sun not to move. It was audacious faith, and I wondered have such a faith.

But today, I feel convicted to write about a different type of faith. I have to address the attitude of a generation of faith after defeat. If you turn a few chapters earlier, we see the story of Ai in Joshua 7, a story often neglected by ministers who only want to speak about God's love and not His justice. After the incredible victory over Jericho, the children of Israel began to develop a name for themselves. Through worship, they defeated this great city, and so when they came to Ai and saw how small it was, they were confident that they could win easily. The craziest part was that Ai went to battle at all, knowing the reputation of the Israelites. They could have tried to make a treaty with Israel like the Gibeonites, but Ai was stubborn and chose to fight. So who won? Not whom we wanted. Joshua's generation suffered a great loss that day, not in number necessarily but in spirit. "The hearts of the people melted and became like water." [Joshua 7:5]

I can't tell you how many times that happens in our lives as Christians. We are coming off the high of a recent spiritual victory, and something ever so small trips us. Often times, Ai represents our flesh - a seemingly insignificant but ever persistent, constantly pestering enemy that we have to sacrifice perpetually or we fall readily.

Joshua cried out to the Lord and asked, "Why have you brought this people over the Jordan at all?" [Joshua 7:7] God revealed to Joshua the problem. He told him that one man had done an accursed thing; he had stolen from the spoil of Jericho in his greediness. The Lord revealed to Joshua the identity of this man, Achan, and the people of Israel threw great stones upon him, his family, and all his possessions. Nothing of Achan's was spared on its own innocence. [Joshua 7:16-25]

I think about Achan's children and maybe even grandchildren who were stoned to death. It makes me want to ignore the story and move on to the next chapter, but this story is in the Bible for a reason. Sometimes, we have to lose heart over an unexpected defeat for us to listen to God and look inside to see the sin within. As I said, often this sin is related to our flesh, but sometimes it is something else. I don't know with what you struggle today, but I assure you that unless you repent of your ways, you will never defeat Ai, and you will make a mockery of the name of God as those around you see your fear and inability. It's hard to hear, but unless you kill Achan and everything related to him, you are not living in Christ, but live as an enemy of God and an enemy to His people. Sometimes innocent things are the fruit of our small sins. The example that comes to mind is the innocent love that springs from the blatantly wrong decision to have a relationship with a non-Christian, or even to pursue a relationship with a Christian that you know is not a part of God's will. It has to be severed, and everything that goes with it must die.

After you have honestly put your sin behind you, there is another obstacle to face. You need to have teh faith that you will win this time around. before it was easier, because you had just overcome a problem you thought was so much greater than Ai. Now it is different. You are a soldier staring across the battlefield at the same warrior of Ai who killed your friend and left you running for cover. Can you be confident this time that God will be with you? How do we have faith after a defeat? How do we know this time God will fight for us?

I don't know. Our "Ai struggles" are incessant and more powerful than we give them credit for, and so it can be daunting to think we have to face them again. The only thing I can suggest is to make sure God sends you to battle. The next chapter starts, "Now the Lord said to Joshua ..." [Joshua 8:1] Notice that Joshua did not think, "Now that we've taken care of that nasty business, we can go ahead and fight again." Joshua understood that handling our Ai struggles usually takes time; it does not easily resolve. I'm sure that Israel had to suffer through pain and mourning over the loss of Achan's family. But when the time was right, the Lord called Joshua to take up his armor and fight. And God, being the omniscient God He is, knew the heart of Israel and said, "Do not be afraid, nor be dismayed ..." Furthermore, He instructed that all the people go to war this time, not just the few thousand sent before. When we fight Ai, it is imperative that not a single part of us is reluctant. It really does take full surrender or defeat is certain. But we can be confident in this: God has promised that Ai "has been given into [our hands]." [Joshua 8:1]

Faith takes courage I admit. First, we need the courage to put to death the Achan inside. Second, we need the courage to fight again. Both are extremely difficult. Essentially, we are ripping out a part of our heart, and then building it up again. No one but God can give us teh strength to do this. But my prayers are with you in this struggle, and I know that when you obey, God is going to surrender this Ai into your hands. Take this, cling to this as your personal promise.

God bless,
Alisha

Jesus Is No Fool

As I mentioned in the last devotional, there is a group of Christians who I honestly do avoid. One I addressed were the proud Pharisee-type Christians. The second group are the worldly Christians.

The phrase "worldly Christians" is of course an oxymoron. Romans 12:2 admonishes, "Do not be conformed to this world ..."

Clarification is necessary. Christians do not have to take a monk-like oath to remain completely separated from the world. The separation that comes with Christianity, holy separation, is internal. A popular phrase is to be "in but not of" the world. Abstaining from interaction with non-Christians is fruitless, and when I find myself doing this I seriously have to question my relationship with Christ. The joy I find in a relationship with Jesus Christ should make me want to share this with everyone, particularly those I love. If I do not share my experience with the world, then it stems from two reasons: either I do not find particular joy in this relationship ,or I do not love the non-Christian enough to want her to experience the same joy.

While in this world, though, we are expected to not conform to it. This is what the worldly Christian does. How can I describe her? She goes places that where temptation is rampant, her mind more concerned with saving face than saving her non-Christian friend. She allows herself "slips" of the tongue, so her non-Christian friends know that she is not uptight. She takes on popular ideologies, not thinking of their roots (and more importantly their intentions), and often tries to incorporate them into Christianity. She finds similarities between Christianity and all other religions so that she does not stand out in the world, but enjoys standing out in her uptight church. She frequently condemns pride and seldom lust - which, by the way, stems from pride - and spends most of her time using Christianity politically to make it a happy face that the world can easily accept.

I hate that she dilutes the word of God, twisting it for her own use. I hate that she goes to places where ethos is suffocated. I hate that she sings hymns on Sunday and songs about sex and money the other six days. I hate that she knows she's a hypocrite, and so avoids the topic of her meanderings by intellectually condemning the black-and-white viewpoint of Christianity. And, as is the case with the Pharisees, I hate her because I am her.

I want to get along with the world, especially my non-Christian friends. I love that they do not condemn me for my wrongful deeds, often laughing at my "slips" as mere child's play. I am comfortable here, on a common ground with all humanity, pushing for world peace but forgetting the Author of its truest form. Sometimes, when I think about how kind and loving some non-Christians are, especially those with whom I've recently come in contact, I want Christianity to be an easy thing to accept. I want to show them the verse about the "easy burden" [Matthew 11:30] and not the verse about "taking up the cross." [Matthew 16:24]. I want to reveal to them the Old Testament God who calls Abraham a friend [Isaiah 41:8], and not the One who was satisfied with the death of Achan and his children [Joshua 7]. I want the Bible to fit to our culture, to make sense to our era, our mantras. But it doesn't. It is not from this world and so the world cannot accept it without rejecting their own standards.

I fear, like with the Pharisees, that if I expose myself to these worldly Christians, I will become them. Yet I find myself becoming them as I expose myself to and get closer with non-Christians. Nevertheless, there is this task I have to minister to the lost, whether it is the lost non-Christian or the lost worldly Christian. How can I find strength to do so, when all I desire is appeasement?! How indeed.

The answer, I'm finding, is that I can't. I can't have a lost best friend. But we're all lost at some level, so what is my hope? I find strength only in Christ. He took on 12 best friends who were losers through and through. They were shabby men from the crudest backgrounds, and He made them missionaries who shook the globe. I'm convinced that if I let Him be my best friend, He can change me. His fellowship is the catalyst that will then change my fellowship with others.

I must admit these devotionals on fellowship are killing me. The emphasis that His is fellowship that we need to change and improve our fellowship with others is correct It's His fellowship, however, that is difficult. God is neither tangible (though we feel Him) nor audible (though we hear Him). Working on a relationship with Christ has all the difficulties and strains of a earthly relationship. Actually, it's backwards: earthly relationships have all the strains of the crucial relationship with Christ. But they're easy in comparison because people are on our level and thus predictable.

I mention this only to warn you, that when you seek after Christ's fellowship, that is indeed what you receive. It is a relationship, thus you must deny yourself to follow Him.[Matthew 16:24]. But He will train you. Then perfect abiding with others will come naturally, not only because people are easier to understand, but because you will finally truly understand them when you look through Christ's eyes. You may, and probably will, understand yourself better, too. Thus, fellowship with Christ is worth bearing the cross. It was to Him, and Jesus is no fool.

God bless,
Alisha